Ok, it's sinking in...

Doom approaches.

Life Sucks.

Monday, what great timing.

Will I survive??????

A month too far...

Hmm, no idea why on earth I had that title..Maybe if I kept on writing I'd figure it out. Sometimes even I don't understand how my brain works....hehe

I'm actually at work on a saturday and tomorrow I will be too. I actually have work that I don't mind coming over on a weekend to finish. I guess I'm relishing the responsibility my new role places on me...Though the fact that I'm blogging when I should be working means that all the above is crap..hahaha

After some further thought, the title actually is not appropriate for this post, though much much more appropriate in my other blog. Oh well. I can't afford to reveal too much of the inner me here unless I want to kill myself. Literally.

Ok, now that I'm determined that suicide is not part of the agenda, let's get on to some updating:

1) I've wrecked my car. Not exactly totaled it, but I've aged it significantly by doing something really stupid last weekend. I drove half way around town with my handbrakes on!! Ok, I'll use the excuse that the handbrake lights didn't come on, but as excuses go......Oh, and it's called Shrek. Maybe a little small when comparing other cars, but as a 'person' about the size of Shrek.

2) Work's good especially when I'm getting a good dose of support from my boss. Also helps that I still feel I'm doing something with a purpose and with justification. Though like the previous roles, the novelty eventually goes away and the usual politics come into play. Nothing last forever....

3) Did I mention I'm on a restricted diet? Hmm, not too bothered to check what I've posted before, so I'll say it again. I'm on restricted diet. Has been enforced since end of June, though I have caved in every now and then. But not that bad I hope. I'm to weigh myself tonight to see what the progress is like. Remember, Expect Nothing, Hope for Everything. In this case, no, I'm not hoping to lose 100kgs as that would basically reduce me to a pulp. Yes, a pulp. A real pulp. Though dropping under 100KGs would be lovely. Nah..Not going to happen..:p

4) I'm becoming more and more unable to stay up late. Which means I AM getting old. Well, 10 years and counting. Life begins at 40? Hell no!! Life ends at 40...hahahahahaha (explains why I'm not properly insured...:p)

5) I'm trying to play some kind of sports regularly but looks like nothing is working. Can't swim, can't trek, can't play badminton and futsal games are just a little too far. I have another game tomorrow, though I'm not sure if I want to go. I still have unfinished work you see...

6) I want to drive to Ipoh. Wearn, if you see this, I'm going to be knocking on your door sometimes soon. A night away from KL should be fun. Boring and fun. Though with my food restrictions I'm not sure how much fun from feeding I'll get. First things first, I better burn some better music for the 2 hour drive..:p

7) Webdota is annoucing that it will cease in a month or so time. I am not sure what I'll do if I don't play that anymore..Maybe crims? Nah...I'll have to call up the owner and take him out for a drink to convince him to keep it up..hahaha...Maybe he's getting married?? Hmm, to find out.:p

Tomorrow at noon I will have exactly 10 years left to find me someone to move into the next phase of life with me. As that time reduces, so will my reason to live. For I only need to be living for myself for so long.

Life is good; and Life goes on as long as I still want too...

Eh?

Why am I trying to post here???



Because I don't feel like working???

A new Motto in life

Expect Nothing. Hope for Everything.

Sounds very much like a person who leaves everything to god/fate but coming from me, who has no religion and strongly believes the creator doesn't need/want to interfere, I'm not leaving things to god/fate. Just that in life when one expects, failure hurts and success only meets expectation. With hope, everything that comes true is a joy to happen; Every failure is just another day in life.

In other words I'm trying to be even happier than I already am, which really isn't really that happy.

Oh well, just wanted to document this.

I actually exercised....

by going hill trekking last Sunday.

Man was it tough. 7 stages and I didn't even make half way. Around 2.5 I was already exhausted to death and felt my legs giving way and my lungs collasping. I need to do this more I think...

Should I also mention I'm kind of in a diet? Someone I know volunteered to provide me some dietary advise which failure to follow will result in their wrath....Which at this point of time is the last thing I want to experience. Though in the future, you never know. Maybe once just for the experience, eh? :p

This other guy's blog I read said that ultimately the blog is for the readers, in otherwords YOU who actually read my blog. Funny thing is for me, the true customer is myself. Granted, if I only wanted to write this for my own reading pleasure I should have a private journal (which I do, hehehe) but even this one I more or less write it for my own sake. Sometimes yeah, maybe for others if they are keen but down the line, prior to my demise, I'd probably find time to have a visit down memory lane by reading this AND my other blog. Should be fun. Painful, but fun.

........(1 minute of silence since I don't know what else to type)

Hmm...Adios then....

Trying to blog more....

Is such a chore...
Since I'm a bore...
Really low in lore...

Trying to be happier.
In these days so much darker..
Petrol prices higher..
Income not much better...

Friday's ready to rumble..
At Night we all tumble..
In shop not to far from shambles..
Enough of this mumble jumble..

This weekend something nice..
Should happen to my life..
Though that would make it twice..
My weekend's being nice..

But until it happens..
Will keep my options open....
Hopefully don't get summoned..
By some idiotic person....

Now I'm done with this cheap shot..
at rhyming these lousy lot..
I hope it will not...
Stop me from talking rots....

hahaha..Yeah, random nothings...Sorry

Winds of Change..

No, not quite the Scorpion one..Though taking into consideration how the Euro 2008 has been, there's some winds of change Happening.

So glad France and Portugal are out. Can wait for the loser Italy to get kicked in the balls too.. Lucky **** to make it to the next round..

Recently someone bugged me to write again..But I don't know what to write about, really.

I've moved to a new job in my Company, but other than the title I still seem to be donig what I do....not working.

Even as I type this at 2.43pm local time I'm sleepy and can't get back to my work cos it keeps sending me to sleep.

I'm still playing that Webgame but I'm beginning to lose interest...Haha, but it's still something I use predominantly to keep me awake at work..If I ever get caught i'm sure goinmg to get fired.

I am in the process of acquiring some....ahem..wheels...Hopefully very soon. Despite my country's decision to increase the price of fuel I've found out that mobility at a faster rate is becoming more and more important. Wonder if it's anything to do with my limited mortality as I close in on 75% of liveable period as an individual.

Now what else can I blog about? Hmm, nothing I can state here, I think..Haven't got any nice stories to tell. Maybe in a near future?

A friend of mine got engaged and didn't even tell me until I unwittingly called him while he's 'at it' (as in during the engagement ceremony, you dirty little ***) so I'm a little dissapointed. But it's not like I do these ceremonies well anyway, so I guess it was a blessing in diguise. He's getting married next year...

Hmm, beginning to feel a tug to leave a legacy behind..Guess what I'll be leaving???? Well, maybe you'll find out soon.....muahahahaha..Or I'm just talking rots because I'm running out of ideas..

Another superb change in my life would be if I get drafted to play spin doctor for a nasty politician.. Too bad such a career is non-existent where I live, at least I believe not for my type. I'm also likely to change into a monster. But changes are good, no??

Ok, I'm obviously depressed today. It's one of those days...Will blog later...Like...later....:p

I guessed I didn't....

Continue that post I made in Jan...How sad..

I've since moved in, stunk my room with my manly smell, bought a new PC and setup a wireless connection so 3 of us siblings still stuck under the same roof can all surf online for whatever our reasons may be without asking each other off the PC...

I've also added another webgame to my repertoire, TheCrims, though in this game I don't mingle with other players but another friend of mine who seems to have similar liberties at work (during and off) to play online games and discuss about whores, drugs and breaking the law over the company lines. One day we're so going to get caught....:D

I have also been driving regularly.....Oops, I actually made it public!! Hehe, somehow the ones which I fear would find out I have a feeling don't visit anymore. They've not commented nor have they indicated they still read this sparsely posted blog..For the few who do, mucho gracias and NO, I DON'T OWN A CAR SO DON'T EXPECT FERRYING SERVICES....(yes, I am not and never aspire to be a gentleman, so sod off...haha!!)

Liverpool's having a fine run, hopefully we continue to pick up points and above all, beat Man(f)U(kced) for once in like centuries!! (ok, maybe they did beat them sometime this millienia, but it feels like centuries to me!)

WebDota still takes a bit of my time, but I've gotten to a stage where I don't quite rank top 20, but do keep my arse out of harms way enough to have some fun playing.. I also have deviced a strategy that avoid being targeted in the beginning...(it's known as being fat, I tell ya!)

I realised that I can't play FIFA type games anymore with some competency as the controls have gotten more complex and for one with nigh zero hand-eye coordination, even beating amateur level is a chore...Go figure...

Biological clock ticking aside, let me remind myself and anyone who bothers to read, I'm closing in to the last 10 liveable years of my life. Once I hit 40, if I don't find anything much worth living for, well.......(Don't worry, suicide is not an option...Though hiring a hit for myself don't really count as suicide, right??? :p)

Work's kinda crap for the past few months, but I think I'll post that another time...Let's see if my near endless patience over incompetency, failures and missed opportunities actually hit a limit, or can I go ever lower??? Time will tell.

Sometimes I just need to be told what I already know. Now to find someone or something who'd play that part for me...

I have moved!!!

I no longer live in the small apartment I mentioend previously. My apartment now is slightly bigger, though with the amount of rubbish me and my family have a tendency to accumulate over time, it's just a matter of time before space becoems a prime commodity...But now I'm too sleepy to post somemore...

Will continue this later...

Setting the house on Fire....

Been so busy I haven't had time to post a couple of things that happened to my life recently..Well, here is one of them..


A few weeks back while I was preparing to move to a new apartment, I set my current apartment on fire. Well, not exactly the kind of fire you see on TV where the whole place burns up, but it was significant enough to remind me to always check what's on the bottom of my pots before I place them onto the stove.

You see, it was late night and I realise that I needed food. So I popped 2 frozen Roti Canai (some kind of bread) onto a pan hoping to heat it up nice enough to eat. Without bothering too much on the task, I placed the pan on the stove, light it up and then went back to my internet game (Webdota, if you haven't noticed).

A couple of minutes later I smelt something burning and looked behind me. Yes, my kitchen stove and my PC was less than 7 metres away. To my horror, a fire of about 3 feet was burning right out of my frying pan. Now, in most instances such a fire would not happen, as the pan has been used on that stove a million times before. Yet this time the fire was no joke. What they say about the smoke being worse than the fire is true too. The thick black smoke was really scary.

My first thought was to disconnect the gas from the stove, starving the fire of fuel. But it kept burning. I moved all the flammable items around it to avoid burning up more things, but that pan looks like a real fiery mess. Shouting fire wasn't something I thought I'd ever do for real, but that night I shouted fire alright. The rest of my family came out to see and no one was laughing at the fire..Suffice to say it didn't look like stopping.

Luckily the stove was next to the sink, so ample water source was available. However, I guess I panicked and worried that dousing it with water would cause an explosion of sorts, so it took my mom to actually interfere and douse the fire with a spalsh of water..

That was it. One splash and the fire died. Rather anticlimax, I'd say, but really, I'm glad it ended prematurely. Else I'd had to move out sooner than expected, with a fraction of the possesion since they'd all be burnt already. With the fire gone, we noticed a ring of burnt plastic around the stove. I basically placed the pan which was resting on a plastic potholder which stuck to the bottom when I placed it over the stove. It got burnt to ashes and the pan is now as black as charcoal.

Over the next hour or so the black smoke blew away, leaving the conditions at home back to normal, if you don't miss the stove and the pan...

Life lesson - Always make sure it's just the pot/pan you're placing over the stove before you start the fire. Else, gas isn't the only thing fueling your fire.....

Nothing to Blog....(change to few habits of mine)

Most probably because I have a tendency to write things I feel, yet find things I feel not safe to blog, thus not having much material to blog about. Also add the fact that I find most everyday happenings not worth blogging even though I should enjoy every minute of my life even though I'm not enjoying every minute of my life.

Hmm..I am my own shrink. How cost effective.

I haven't checked my previous post so I haven't an inkling how long since I posted (I could check rather easily but since when wasn't I a lazy type? Let's just assume it was quite a while back...) Ok, so this fat bum lazy boy has nothing to blog about except how he is trying to think positive over things that aren't so positive..Looks like I need something else to type today...

Let's talk about my habits then...


1) Small mechanical devices, shun me! - I have a tendency to destroy small devices, if that's what I should call it. For example, the remote control is usually one item that get's wrecked by me. I like to toy with the battery compartment by opening and closing the lid until a time when the lid falls off and goes missing, or the lid falls off and goes missing. Usually that happens when I'm not around but due to my constant opening and closing of the lid it tends to lose it's simple 'lock' attribute no thanks to wear and tear. Also the following things should be kept out of my idle hands; Pens with springs, torchlights, tupperwares, small toys (you have no idea how many toy cars I've wrecked.. Explains why I don't drive?) and a host of other small items which should fit the bill.

2) Laughing when I should cry - Well, not just crying, but anger, frustration, dissapointment and a host of other negative feelings. I laugh when I experience them. Not so much because I am sadistic and evil (which, I don't deny I am...capable of) but more to the fact that I've grown so accustomed at not being able to show those emotions that I channel them all into smiles and laughter. Nobody minds seeing a smile you see. They do find it annoying when I laugh hysterically at the most ridiculous mishaps so the hyena like laughter is reserved for the most improbable turn of events like erm, like, slipping and falling, a bad knock to the joints, a broken glass/plate, spilling something somewhere, misplaced keys, etc.. Things most people get to shout and scream..I laugh. Really. I do eventually or sometimes show real anger, but due to lack of practice (hehehe, yes, even showing anger needs practice) I seem to no longer be able to show a kind of anger that would worry/scare anyone off. Sad, since no one will be taking me seriously soon (if not already now).

3) Playing the Balancing Role - You see, if it isn't already obvious ( for those few who actually come back and read me rant about me..), I am actually as negative a person as anyone can be.. (Ok, I haven't committed suicide, not attempted it, so I am not as negative until I am dead..) But, when I am in a discussion or when I am talking to someone, I tend to play the other role; If you're a positive person I will throw in negative comments; If you're feeling down I'll try to help you get your spirits up (NOTE: TRY) I don't know why I do it, or if everyone else does it, but I don't seem to have a consistent stand on things. The only thing I try to consistent on is the right for each individual to decide what they want to do in life..But even that it's getting harder and harder these days to NOT attempt to influence another person to do something that I feel is right, or that the action/decision benefit myself to some extent.

4) Fixing Other's language - Well, most of the time it's English, since it's what I think in, speak with and write in. The only problem is that, my English is merely passable at best. Add that to the high number of people who dislike being corrected on the spot/email this habit have a tendency to get me in people's bad books. But I don't want to stop doing this, for I believe I'm simply doing others a service (yeah right, I BELIEVE THAT.....)

5) The number 7 - I just like it..You've got a problem with that?? (now, how do I find 7 habits of mine that won't get me into hot soup???)

Looks like I can't for the moment. I'll probably come back and add somemore habit in the future...Yeah, I like reading my own posts and would come back ot this one sometime in the future.....If I remember......

What???

It's been 40 days since I last posted???

Holy........Looks like blogging is beginning to lose it's appeal.. Or I just don't have much to write for myself to reminiscence. Ah well, considering how boring I am, how much could I write out of sheer crap??

Quick updates:

I'm getting a lot more work now due to my own silliness by taking ownership of a particular system at work. Hopefully it pays off by landing me another job.

Having said that, I recently applied for another job. My interviewer was a manager that shares the same first name (english name, but we're both Chinese) and made it the most stressless interview I've ever been... Too bad he isn't the final decider if I get the job or not...Even then, he might not hire me...I think he thinks I'm making a mistake...:P

Talking about mistakes, I've recently gotten to know some people via the web thanks to my Webdota activity. As always, its easy to find friends and relate to them, but it really takes an argument, a clash of egos, a sudden change of mood and opinions to really bring out what each person really is/are/were/am....I'd like to note though, to any/all those who actually read this (which, for them moment, I think is just myself), I BLOODY WELL KNOW WHAT I AM AND AM NOT AND DON'T NEED SOMEONE ELSE TO TELL ME WHAT I AM. SO STOP TELLING ME WHAT I ALREADY KNOW. It's good to get that off my chest...hahaha

Speaking of being pissed, I'm kinda pissed that Randy Orton, whom while I have as one of my permanent wrestlers which I will collect for Raw Deal but sincerely thinks the guy is too dumb to remember his lines, is WWE Champion. Dont' get me wrong, Cena's been having it for FAR TOO LONG..But Cena needs the title. Without it, his storyline sucks and dunno, I just thinks that he needs it. Randy on the other hand, with stupid Edge now in SmackDown and injured, is the Number One Heel wrestler. He doesn't need the title. He doesn't deserve the title. He just needs to continue being EVIL and dumb. Ok, so I don't like Randy as WWE Champ. Luckily, Batista on the other hand is the World Heavyweight Champ and defeated the boring oldtimer that never wants to retire..wait, sorry, not referring to Ric Flair...but Undertaker. Finally. It took 2 Batista Bombs but they were woth it...Undertaker couldn't even sit up after the first one...

Did I mention bombs??? Oh yes, I did..But I've not nothing to relate to about bombs, so let's digress.

This saturday I will be going to my 3rd consecutive saturday night concert at MPO. Unfortunately, this season started off poorly by making the Gala Concert invitational and I WASN'T invited (considering that I only buy season package of the cheapest tickets, there shoudn't be any reason why that is HARD to believe, but hey, I'm a paying customer too.. For 4 straight seasons!!!) and only went to my first concert 2 weeks ago listening to some Russian composer's pieces which were rather difficult to follow (am I or am I not making my sentences a might to long?? :p). Since then and the concert that just happened over the weekend, I haven't hard much 'good feel' after the concerts..Maybe because I was distracted...Or that I wasn't distracted (sorry, this is an inside joke for myself). In any case, this weekend's Scottish Symphony by Mendelsohn should bring be back to life...(hint Dunhill advertisement)

Bringing me back to life......If I was dead before
Needs more than oxygen.......More than Nature's Law
Though I look much alive........Still contributing as a man
I'm so much dying inside....Wish I could hold your hand


Random attempts at poetry..I suck...:P

Ok, enough random rantings..Back to reality...

Something out of Nothing...

Is what I'm trying to do here...Yes, I have absolutely no idea what to write about but since when has that stopped me from writing 200-300 words telling absolutely nothing?

.....................................................................................

Wow, 2 minutes and still no idea....

Let's just go cheap and update what I've been doing the past few weeks or so, that should rack up some word counts...

1) Last round's WebDota I finally made into top 20 while the round was still ongoing. I previously managed rank 7, but that was a few days after the round was over and some of the ranked players either dropped or became inactive. So some achievement for me..Yay...Boo... 29 and I'm still into gaming. If word got around to the elders of my society, they'd be drilling me with all the age old sayings of life, marriage, kids and future so I'll have an earful of boredom for like, several days. Luckily for me those elders either are, well, in another plane or the only one left I don't quite give 2 hoots what he has to say.

2) Finally getting to do some project work at work and now I seem to lose interest with what I do. Maybe it's time I change environs....Maybe it's time I do something that required me to WORK 40 hours a week. I'll blog much much less since I can't do it on company time, but hey...For guys like me, career satisfaction is at good as it gets, no?

3) EPL and Fantasy Football. Since my PC crashed when my brother returned to visit from Qatar last June, I've not been able to have my own personal entertainment so I've been having to wrestle the home PC (which is connected to the internet) from my brother recently. It's a daily ordeal; Sometimes I win, sometimes I sleep..hehe, go figure. So no football manager games has forced me (yeah right, like I needed to be forced..) to join some online Fantasy Football games. Not 1, but, 2...no, 3...nope...6..I have 6 different teams in 6 different fantasy systems. (my inkling for 7 should drive me to find another team) Yahoo Fantasy Football, Yahoo Champion's League Manager, Nokia Football Manager, Premier League Fantasy Football, Soccernet Champions League Fantasy and UEFA's Champions League Fantasy. Now where do I find that 1 more???? hmmmm..I wonder if I get more busy with work will I be able to keep up with the jones....

4) House Season 3... The times when I had to sleep but didn't fell like sleeping made me watch House Season 3. Actually, it's more like I want to watch it so I didn't sleep. I still think Season 2 was the best, and the quote," Read less, watch more TV" is my favourite. Season 3 (I've not finished, by the way) is not as original as Season 2 as I feel some old themes reoccur with a slight difference of, characters? I understand from mr. Mark Rosewater (he's the Design dude from Magic: the Gathering that I like to read weekly. He has a weekly article over at M:tG.com. He writes much much better than me too) that series and sitcoms need to keep most of it's content the same and just change a little so that the audience doesn't lose the familiarity thingy, but, I dunno, it just feels like the stories are now being reused.. Having said that, House continues to be House, someone we all love to hate. Not to mention you can't beat the sarcasm...

5) What is happening to Raw Deal??? I haven't spent a single cent on the latest expansion and no longer have the urge to do it..I know all it takes is one visit to the gameshop and lo and behold, I paid rent but dunno...Am I losing that passion I have for the game? Will there be no more annual trips to Singapore for the Qualifiers? I still watch wrestling too, but even their stories are becoming tiresome these days and there are much less things that make me laugh these days. For the people that know me, finding it hard to find things to laugh about, for me, is BAD NEWS...

6) Talking about laughing at things, recently my department just grew from 2 person to 5 person team. Now, in the past my 1 colleague, being a veteran and a mother of 1 daughter, has little to bother with this madman of a colleague of hers and thus I have little need to explain my idiosyncrasies. But now I have 3 OTHER mothers in my department and my random demonic laughs now need to be explained or removed from my work environment. I am not pleased, of course, nor will I likely care...But you see, I'm still trying to write something out of nothing, so I think I got like 70 words out of this???? Hahahaha...

7) Recently on one of my friend's birthday I sent him a late late but on time birthday SMS with no reply. Now this guy I've known for over a decade, through his years when we took buses together, when he could drive but did it like a girl, then sitting on the navigator's seat while he drives half/three quarters asleep; From his girl chasing days to his chased by girls days, to him being steady for 7 years, him splitting up and him being in and out of relationships; Now obviously he should be with his significant other on his birthday, (else I'd give his significant other a good sounding or 2) so for him not to be able to reply that day is acceptable. But it took me 3 days and me calling him to find out he has no credit on his handphone. Lame. Real lame. Oh well, I guess I'm just sensitive over nothing. But damn lame..

I guess friends come and go and when the friendship has ran it's course over its useful years, it just dies away. I've never been able to keep friends for that long anyway, so I end up making new ones every now and then therefore there is absolutely nothing to complain. But it does makes me envy people who have friends from childhood all the way till their deaths....How lucky. They should cherish that all their lives.

As for me, it's not like I didn't know I'm in it for the long haul, alone. I'll get over it...I think...hahaha....

Under Attack

Non- Me related. Looks like my blog has received some unexpected attention recently. Not that I mind, since what's a blog without readers?? Erm, a blog??

So fire away with your comments if any though I'm unlikely to respond to them here since, well, I scarcely can recall most of what I post here without reading them again...

Speaking of which, I should post more now that viewership has increased at least by 30-50%...(yeah, that's how much a couple of readers is worth...This blog shucks...:P)


So what Should I write about?

Ah well....

I guess the trip wasn't worth mentioning.

Things getting busier at work with more challenges coming in. Hopefully I'll cope, but I don't , I might just break down here....NOT...

Erm, what else should I update...Haven't been involved in Raw Deal for awhile. If I don't gt back into the game I might as well as plan to quit it..But the cost would have been tremendous to leave it, not that I haven't done it before..I still have unopened V:TES packs....sigh

EPL is back and my Yahoo Fantasy Football Team is absolutely shite. I wish I could do better, maybe by picking less players on a whim and doing more research....Maybe...

The only thing that I'm happy for, as in really happy is to find a weekly futsal game that I could join. It won't be enough to keep me fit, but surely gives me an opportunity to stretch my fat-laden muscles..I so need to workout...Haha...Wait, I'm suppose to deny that...

Oh well, life goes on....Wish myself luck for the next 2 months....

50 cents...

Shouldn't have made that 'In Da Club' song...It's running through me head a lot today, or just the opening verses...

Yeah, it's mah B'day...Relatively boring so far...Which shouldn't be suprising considering how my birthday's have been for the past, erm, millenia...

Tonight will have a dinner with Roy & KE (and Hubby, hahaha), but till that happens, so far it has been a eventless birthday...

Which is somewhat rare considering my birthdays have always borne grave news....At least to me...

Tomorrow I embark on a journey up north with a group of people I hardly mingle with. Why I'm doing that? I dunno. Maybe I finally felt bored enough and decided mingling with people I hold little interest in is still better than no human interaction. Besides, having someone drive me to Penang isn't always a bad idea....

Still have very little to write about...Maybe because it's in between EPL seasons, with no international competition to sate the football appetite....

Ok, maybe will blog about the trip up north...see how first...

Uber Quick Update

What I've Been Doing - WebDota, Dota...Nothing Else

What I've not Been Doing - Blogging...Duh..

What I didn't Know I've done - Nothing....No luck here.... :p

What I've learned to DO - use smileys....No thanks to WebDota..:D. :-) :-( :-< :-O X-(.....many more

What I Have Done Finally - Had a meal in Jogoya...Nothing spectacular IMHO except for the size of the buffet line....I mean lines...

What I Might Not Realise I've Done - Stood someone up...hahaha

What I Wish I Could Do - Not Have to Work..Someone give me RM 5K-10K a month please...:p

What I will be Doing Tomorrow - Trip with siblings to Taman Negara = Feed Mosquitoes

What I Forgot to do - Withdraw cash

What I Shouldn't have Done - Sign Up for Pool in my company when I suck....:-(. Also shouldn't have gotten that 1 free ticket to watch harry Potter....It's going ot be a lonesome night....:-(

What's Looking Good - my weight....It's growing...:P

What's Really Looking Good - Kiera Knightley??? :p

What's Really Looking Good and Related to Me - ?????????

Losing the Blogging Feeling...

Quick check. Last blog entry 27th April...That's one month's exodus from here...Not good.

It didn't help that I didn't have much to write about recently...There are things to write, but writing them may result in personality suicide..So I'll digress.

Now, what have I got to blog today?

A little update in my life. Last Friday my company had a bowling tournament. Ever since I joined 4 years ago, I haven't missed this annual tournament, so no prizes for guessing that I was amongst the first few to sign up. The way this noob/amateur tournament goes is that there's always a group competition (best of select number of players' points total) and best individual players. Now (Telling the story like most women would..), I've never really been a good bowler, averaging about 100 points per game with a lifetime high of maybe 180 or so..Yes, I'm le'suck in bowling...Many others as well (as you'd know later!) So as always all I wanted to do was to get 2 games of free bowling, lousy but free dinner and a chance to spend fun time at companies' expense..Oh, may I note in the past the individual and team events were seperated..i.e. "Those who are good or think too highly of their bowling" would join the individual competition, while the random others would partake in the team event. Yes, no prizes for guessing team event scores are relatively low..This year however, singles play for team as well and vice versa.

Ok, on to the event. It's supposed to kick off at 6.30pm but knowing us Malaysians, it didn't start until 7.30pm...While waiting, I had the decency to begin a chant, "we want food" to subtly hint to our organisers we were hungry..Subtly because if I was obvious I would have gone for the food directly! Food was horrible. Chicken cocktails, chicken nuggets, sandwiches of the el'cheapo type and random local pastries was what dinner would be. No refills too. (Wonder why I would complain about refills if I didn't like the food? Then you don't know me at all, hahaha!)

Back track half an hour before, it was time to input our names in the play roster. I'm commonly known as Benjamin Lam, but that night I felt like using a nickname given to me by my CCG circle, Judge Ben, so I changed my name to just initials JB. When asked what it meant I said Johor Baharu..Ok, I wasn't that keen on giving them the whole story of how I play M:tG, judge M:tG, quit it, played Raw Deal Wrestling, etc...Until I got coined the name JB. Not to mention there were 3(at least) different Benjamin's in that gaming circle and I wasn't actually big enough to qualify as Big Ben (there was a bigger Ben). The small Ben nickname obviously went to someone else.

Looking at my team's players I was quite sceptical we'd do well, but then again I never expected any podium finish anyway. Oh, there's only 4 teams in contention, so you would guess what my expectations were on not getting podium finish. Now this other team, known as Fumo Blue (mine is Conquerors while the remainnig 2 are Blazers and....and....the other team...) had this pro looking player who hits quite a strike. Halfway playing the first game (we would have 2), I noticed he was playing 2 different games and that....wait, this part of the story shouldn't be here...

FYI, on friday I had a sore thumb. On my left hand. I'm left handed. It's actually an infection which recurred despite 2 weeks ago I finished all the antibiotics the GP gave me and it receded. Well, on Friday it appeared again. It was painful too. I was sincerely considering not to play. However, looking at how my team lined up, I felt compelled to do my bit to help score some points. I figured besides a handful of regular players, most of us were either noobs or noobs. Therefore a contribution of 100 points per game (200 in total) would serve well in the team competition. So I played through the pain barrier. Literally..

Ok, back to the game. So this pro player was playing 2 games, which isn't fair at all so I complained. In more respectful and honourable situations, you'd expect the organisers to disqualify the 'cheating' team, but alas, it was not to be. All I managed was to get that other game's score ignored for team totals...bah..

My first game was ok, scoring at 122 despite no strikes.. I was still adjusting to the game and getting the right throw angle and using the correct bowling ball, so 122 is actually quite good. For the second game, the pro player I was mentioning, started off with a strike. Then another strike. Then a turkey. Then his fourth strike consecutively for that game. Then a fifth strike. Then his lane had technical issues which delayed the game for almost 10 minutes. Needless to say he lost his rhythm. he still ended up with a game high of 204.. As for me, did I mention he was bowling to my left and that he always bowls just before me? You could say I was under pressure, but the truth is I wasn't. I'm just not competitive enough to fight the big boys. On the other hand, the smaller ones, the ones who love the gutter some what, they are by feeders.

Now, as I was saying, I had a sore thumb. Add that to an unfit body, I was not throwing straight at all. I was even having difficulties sparing. Then I hit a chord. Everytime I walk up to the lane, as I carry the bowling ball, I would sing one of Evanescence's songs somewhat aloud. I would not finish singing the song, so in the next frame I would sing the next song. I do take pride in knowing 10 out of 11 songs in Fallen so I had enough songs to sing for my 2nd game. Worse comes to worse, I'd just sing the 2 songs I know from The Open Door. No problem. You'd probably not believe it had any effect, but my second game score was 184. I had 1 turkey and I believed only failed to spare in 2 frames. In those frames I failed to spare, it was because I forgot the lyrics of the next song...Haha, losing memory after all.

So I had a game total of 306, which as I mentioned earlier, with most of us being lousy bowlers, it was enough to get me 2nd place. (The pro player got first, of course!) Still not bad for an unfit, injured noob I think. Not to mention, I should play this game more often. It's fun, burns some calories and makes me look like I'm loco...I mean, nutty.

So that was last Friday..See, so much easier to blog if I had something to blog about...

Oh, I have nothing to say about Liverpool's lost in the Champions' League Final except, out of luck...

Do comeback sometime...


(Do anyone of you get what I meant by telling the story like a woman would?)

What I haven't been doing:

1) Driving
2) Building Wrestling Decks
3) Updating my Resume
4) Summing up effort and courage for the.....next..
5) Composing (hmm, should really be doing this and not all those hours playing PC games)
6) Going to the movies...

I know it's an imperfect list, but I can't find a '7' that's worth mentioning...

What I have been doing, on the other hand.....:

1) Playing online/multiplayer games....Bad bad bad....But but but......(DOTA!!!!)
2) Following European Football like it's the only reason I'm alive...Ok, not as fanatical, but as bad as can be without being fanatical (i.e. I won't stay up at 3am in the morning just to catch a semi-finals match...But if Liverpool is in the final, I.....nevermind..)
3) Trying to own a house....Though bad luck has it no banks will loan me money, sob...

Wow, can't even find the fourth thing I'm doing....What a ridiculously boring existence....Not that there's anything wrong with that.....hahaha....

Random post huh?

Of Romantic Movies....

A quick aside....I noticed that most (if not all) the romantic movies that I find nice are actually those where the female protagonist is one with wit, intelligence and more common than not, 'strong-willed'. (shall not also highlight pleasing to the eye too!)

The funny thing is, I haven't had the good fortune to actually know such a female in my life, not so much to be romantically involved with (those reading this blog often enough should know that never happens with me) but to at least know they truly exist.

I guess they probably do in more established planes, i.e. one of the rich and famous, or one of the extremely intelligent circle. However, for folks like the me, we only get to know such beautiful creatures in the movies, which gives them an even more angelic mien since only in our dreams do they exist.

I wish I am living in my dreams rather than reality then....

On another side note, here's Evanescence's Good Enough:

Under your spell again,
I can't say no to you.
Crave my heart and it's bleeding in your hand,
I can't say no to you....
Shouldn't have let you torture me so sweetly,
Now I can't let go of this dream
I can't breathe but I feel...Good enough,
I feel good enough for you.

Drink up sweet decadence,
I can't say no to you,
And I've completely lost myself and I don't mind,
I can't say no to you...
Shouldn't have let you conquer me completely,
Now I can't let go of this dream
Can't believe that I feel good enough,
I feel good enough...
It's been such a long time coming, but I feel good.

And I'm still waiting for the rain to fall,
Pour real life down on me.
'Cause I can't hold on to anything this good enough...
Am I good enough for you to love me too?

So take care what you ask of me,
'cause I can't say no.

I can imagine being in this position with one of those angels.....